3 years ago Tim and I started this amazing, crazy journey called foster to adopt. And in just a few more days our children will be all together at home.
On Friday we went to court to have the judge approve the move of the kids from their foster home to us. (Ironically, the same date 1 year ago we were in court and a judge approved the move for Nisha to leave). Court went well, and thanks to Judge Jamal the kids are coming home on Monday!!! It did make me smile when we started their case we all have to introduce ourselves and the judge asked me who I was....I said I'm hopefully going to be their adoptive mom, if you approve it ma'am :)
And then she thanked us for adopting the kids and loving them....that never fails to blow my mind when a judge or a social worker says that to us. They have no idea how much we feel blessed and honored to have been chosen to be their parents!!
It's amazing how God keep providing for us in our case....Isaiah's court appointed attorney has been AMAZING!!! She actually knows her clients, and really works and cares about what happens to them!!! She has really been in our corner for his case and pushing to keep Isaiah here. So even though she's not the attorney for Lilyana and Daniel, she came to court with us on Friday! Because the kids CPS worker is....well, I'm gonna leave that one alone.....our attorney presented their case, affirmed to the judge that we were the best placement for the kids. The judge asked me a few questions and we were done!! The CPS worker never had to say a word! We have been so blessed by this attorney!!
Just as a side note, I'm gonna get up on my foster/adopt soap box again :) I know that I seem to be up here alot!! While we were waiting in court they reviewed at least 30 other cases. Almost all of them I heard them say: "the goal is unrelated adoption, the child is in a foster home, CPS is trying to find an adoptive placement." Wow, and that was just one day, one hour in court. There are so many kids currently in the system that are just waiting for a home and somebody to love them. I've had so many people say to me that they have thought about doing foster care or adopting. If God is tugging on your heart related to this don't ignore Him. Here is a link to the Texas TARE website. waiting kids These are kids in Texas who are just waiting for a home to adopt them. There are many more than this too!! Here is also a link to the agency that we go thru. Depelchin If you are interested, this is a great place to start. They have a free, no commitment intro session several times a month for more information. This have been such a great support to us thru all of this!!!
Ok, I'm gonna hop down off my soapbox now :)
So how about an update on my kids....
Isaiah is pretty much hating the fact that the kids aren't here right now (you and me both buddy!) He has quickly gotten used to have them around to entertain him!! He is also at a bit of a difficult age right now...He's learned how to pull up, but doesn't have great balance yet. Which means he has alot of bumps and bruises on his poor little head! I'm thinking of buying a helmet....
Lilyana and Daniel will be here permanently on Monday!!! The transition visits couldn't have gone better!! Their foster family has been amazing with everything. I know the hurt and sadness that they are going thru, but they have been so supportive in the move. Giving us plenty of time with the kids, asking us what we want them to say to the kids...just wonderful!!
So you want to know more cute things about my kids?? Ok :)
Lilyana: When she does something to make you laugh she says: "look, I made you funny" She calls a hippopotamus, a whoopopotamus.....everytime!!
Daniel...he is obsessed with Isaiah....He's always calling for baby Yeahya! When you ask for a hug he gives you a great bear hug and then walks away smacking his lips like he's kissing you.
Ok, this has become longer than I intended....
Love to you all!!!
Saturday, June 9, 2012
Thursday, May 24, 2012
What I already love....
Lilyana, Daniel and Isaiah....my sweet babes. We have started with transition visits and that pretty much means we have the kids one full day during the week and then on the weekends. It's not long enough. We wanted to give them a few weeks of a transition time to get to know us but now it just seems way to long and June 8th seems too far away. On Tuesday evening when we dropped them back off with their foster parents, the parents asked if we wanted to do their baths and tuck them in for the night...YES! At the end of the evening we all snuggled on Lily's bed and said our prayers. I hated leaving that moment. In my head I know that we are going to have thousands more of those moments in the future, but my heart just wants to hold on to that one!
One of my other friends Casey blogged about what she didn't want to forget about her kids and the stages that they are in....my spin on it today is "What I already love..." It does amaze me how much in love with them I already am.
Lilyana, her sweet little smile. The way I overheard as she and Tim were walking out to the van "Is Mama coming too?" How she turned on the princess charm when the neighbor kids came over to play. Within just minutes she had them doing whatever she asked! How she keeps bringing Isaiah toys to play with and then coming to tell me just in case I didn't see her do it. How she just wants you to praise her. I could keep going on....
Daniel, my little linebacker. He's built like a solid tank and walks thru the room like a bulldozer taking out everything in his path! I love how at times he just follows Lilyana around doing everything she does (which means Isaiah is getting alot of toys piled in front of him!). How he is constantly hungry!! How he keeps insisting on calling grapes, apples no matter how hard we try to convince him that they are called grapes. How he points out every bird in the sky. The way he roars with everything he's got at dinosaurs! How when he throws a fit he goes at it whole-heartedly! He has alot of passion in him!!
Isaiah, my little muppet. How he's gone from being a mama's boy to wanting to be independent (ok maybe I don't love that completely). I love how when he doesn't want something he throws his arms up crossed in front of his face. How he inch worms his way across the floor. How his crazy hair sticks straight up in the air!! I love how enamored he is with his brother and sister!! And he is such a happy easy baby!
My heart aches for the times that I've missed in each of their lives. Lilyana has a chest tube scar that no one can tell me about. Isaiah was alone in the NICU for the first 8 weeks of his life. Daniel had surgeries that I wasn't there for.
In the beginning of our journey our agency asked us if we would consider adopting older, non-infant kids. As we discussed it the conclusion we can to was even though we missed the first part of their lives, if we said no we would miss out on so much more! The rest of their lives with us! I have no regrets about that decision....only a bit of sadness that I wasn't there from the start.
More and more foster care and adoption is taking ahold of my heart. Tim and I have been so blessed by the kids in our lives. Please prayerfully consider if foster care should be a choice for your family.
I can't wait for what our future holds!!!
One of my other friends Casey blogged about what she didn't want to forget about her kids and the stages that they are in....my spin on it today is "What I already love..." It does amaze me how much in love with them I already am.
Lilyana, her sweet little smile. The way I overheard as she and Tim were walking out to the van "Is Mama coming too?" How she turned on the princess charm when the neighbor kids came over to play. Within just minutes she had them doing whatever she asked! How she keeps bringing Isaiah toys to play with and then coming to tell me just in case I didn't see her do it. How she just wants you to praise her. I could keep going on....
Daniel, my little linebacker. He's built like a solid tank and walks thru the room like a bulldozer taking out everything in his path! I love how at times he just follows Lilyana around doing everything she does (which means Isaiah is getting alot of toys piled in front of him!). How he is constantly hungry!! How he keeps insisting on calling grapes, apples no matter how hard we try to convince him that they are called grapes. How he points out every bird in the sky. The way he roars with everything he's got at dinosaurs! How when he throws a fit he goes at it whole-heartedly! He has alot of passion in him!!
Isaiah, my little muppet. How he's gone from being a mama's boy to wanting to be independent (ok maybe I don't love that completely). I love how when he doesn't want something he throws his arms up crossed in front of his face. How he inch worms his way across the floor. How his crazy hair sticks straight up in the air!! I love how enamored he is with his brother and sister!! And he is such a happy easy baby!
My heart aches for the times that I've missed in each of their lives. Lilyana has a chest tube scar that no one can tell me about. Isaiah was alone in the NICU for the first 8 weeks of his life. Daniel had surgeries that I wasn't there for.
In the beginning of our journey our agency asked us if we would consider adopting older, non-infant kids. As we discussed it the conclusion we can to was even though we missed the first part of their lives, if we said no we would miss out on so much more! The rest of their lives with us! I have no regrets about that decision....only a bit of sadness that I wasn't there from the start.
More and more foster care and adoption is taking ahold of my heart. Tim and I have been so blessed by the kids in our lives. Please prayerfully consider if foster care should be a choice for your family.
I can't wait for what our future holds!!!
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Mother's Day
Mother's Day...Just the phrase alone creates so many different emotions.
I remember just a few years back the total avoidance of the day. I knew that God had a promise of a family for us, but as it was not yet fulfilled, I wanted nothing to do with that day. Including scheduling myself to work so I wouldn't have to go to church :)
Then the last few years...so bittersweet. The last 3 Mother's Days I've held sweet children in my arms. Happy and honored that I was chosen to be their mother, yet so sad knowing that they wouldn't be there forever. And always remembering the girls who had already left us.
And this year...Today I am remembering my precious girls who I miss so much! They taught me to much about how to be a momma and how to love. I never imagined that I could love like that.
As I held Isaiah today I'm overwhelmed with emotion. Everyday it is more promising that we will be able to adopt him in the fall. It's almost surreal. He is an amazing little man and is nothing like the little premature baby that we brought home in August!
And then I got an even more amazing Mother's Day gift...
This past week we found out that 2 more children will be placed in our home for adoption!! Isaiah's brother and sister!!! No for real...like his biological brother and sister!! They have been in a wonderful Christian foster home for the last 2 years and now we have been given the opportunity to be their parents. It's almost unbelievable.
Lilyana is 4 and Daniel is almost 2...and yes Isaiah is almost 1 :) Pray for us! We are incredibly excited, nervous, happy and scared all rolled into one! They are great kids, but at their ages the transition will be difficult at first. We have already started visits with them and are hoping to bring them home the second week in June.
We are asking for prayers for them to attach well to us, and a smooth transition. And pray that we know how to be the parents that they need. We are so blessed that they have been in a loving stable home for 2 years. We are very grateful to their foster parents. Pray for the foster parents as well that they will be comforted when they leave.
What a precious Mother's Day this year....We are finally having glimpses of a vision of what our forever family will look like.
I remember just a few years back the total avoidance of the day. I knew that God had a promise of a family for us, but as it was not yet fulfilled, I wanted nothing to do with that day. Including scheduling myself to work so I wouldn't have to go to church :)
Then the last few years...so bittersweet. The last 3 Mother's Days I've held sweet children in my arms. Happy and honored that I was chosen to be their mother, yet so sad knowing that they wouldn't be there forever. And always remembering the girls who had already left us.
And this year...Today I am remembering my precious girls who I miss so much! They taught me to much about how to be a momma and how to love. I never imagined that I could love like that.
As I held Isaiah today I'm overwhelmed with emotion. Everyday it is more promising that we will be able to adopt him in the fall. It's almost surreal. He is an amazing little man and is nothing like the little premature baby that we brought home in August!
And then I got an even more amazing Mother's Day gift...
This past week we found out that 2 more children will be placed in our home for adoption!! Isaiah's brother and sister!!! No for real...like his biological brother and sister!! They have been in a wonderful Christian foster home for the last 2 years and now we have been given the opportunity to be their parents. It's almost unbelievable.
Lilyana is 4 and Daniel is almost 2...and yes Isaiah is almost 1 :) Pray for us! We are incredibly excited, nervous, happy and scared all rolled into one! They are great kids, but at their ages the transition will be difficult at first. We have already started visits with them and are hoping to bring them home the second week in June.
We are asking for prayers for them to attach well to us, and a smooth transition. And pray that we know how to be the parents that they need. We are so blessed that they have been in a loving stable home for 2 years. We are very grateful to their foster parents. Pray for the foster parents as well that they will be comforted when they leave.
What a precious Mother's Day this year....We are finally having glimpses of a vision of what our forever family will look like.
Saturday, March 10, 2012
How do you spell stress??
Wow! It's been an eventful few months around the Gould house! Where do I even start?
I logged on here to write an update about how we are doing without Shaye, and how Isaiah is doing and I found my self reading my last blog about foster care and the need for new homes. A little humbling and a great reminder that although we are longing for children and wanting to adopt, foster care is not about us....dang, did I really write that?
So anyway, around Christmas-time we found out that Shaye would be leaving in a few months to be placed with her grandparents and that she would start having visits soon. In January they started with visits....They are nice, normal people who love her very much. She will be safe and loved. My heart still aches with missing her silly antics and her big hugs, but we are doing well. Truth be told, it was much harder for us during the two months that she was still here, but we knew that she was leaving. You really can't move on with your life while she's still in it. The past three weeks have gone fast, but it still seems like a lifetime ago. She didn't cry when she left, and just waved and said bye-bye....love that silly girl! (for those of you wondering if I'm super-woman, yes I'm crying right now)
I was really worried how Isaiah would handle her being gone. He was so obessed with her! He was always looking for her, laughing at her, and would cry when she would walk away. He's been in heaven!! Apparently being an only child suits him just fine!
He's really becoming interactive and such a happy baby! He developmentally right on target for his premie age. He's finally figured out how to eat off of spoon (I have to put in here that he eats much better for momma). He is really becoming such a momma's boy, and I'm completely ok with that! He's also my only kid who has been a snuggler :) How much more can I say about him? He's just wonderful!!
Health-wise he's doing great as well! He still breathes a little fast and occasionally has a "noisy" airway, but all of that is really improving. His lung doctor has realeased him from her care so that's a great improvement. He now only has 4 doctors to follow up with :) Hey that's down from 7!!
One huge answer to prayer that we hadn't shared with many people was his genetic testing. Back in October we received information that supposedly at least 4 of his 6 siblings had muscular dystrophy, and a 5th one was being tested. My heart hit the floor. All that I could think of was all of the kids that I had seen in the PICU who were dying from Muscular Dystrophy and I was terrified! CPS couldn't/wouldn't give us specific information regarding the type of MD the siblings had and they wouldn't put us in touch with the families that have custody of them. It was a very frustrating situation. There are many types of MD and none of the docs wanted to just send out random testing until they knew what type the siblings have. Especially since Isaiah wasn't having sypmtoms (symptoms typically don't appear until age 3-5 years) It took us several months to get an appointment with a genetics doctor to see him. God worked for us that we were able to be seen in the same hospital system that his siblings are seen in and we at least were able to obtain the sibs names from CPS so that the docs could access their records. Because of privacy laws the docs couldn't tell us much, but at least we found out that only 2 of the siblings have MD and what type they have. We were able to test Isaiah for that type and 3 weeks later (just this past week) found out that HE DOESN'T HAVE MUSCULAR DYSTROPHY!!!
The word relief doesn't even begin to describe what I was feeling. I was really struggling with the possible diagnosis. Isaiah had already dealt with so much being born 11 weeks early that I felt that it just wasn't fair for him to have somethings else to deal with. God showed me alot about trusting thru this and I still haven't really completely processed this yet.
So for those of you who have been thinking that I have been acting like a hot mess, nutcase for the past few months, please see the above paragraphs and please forgive me :) Irritable and emotional doesn't begin to describe it. But hopefully I haven't been too bad :) I've had such great friends supporting us during this time and I thank you so much!! You all have been awesome thru everything and I appreciate you more than you can imagine. You know that I try to put on a good face. Some of the greatest things that I hear from them have been: I'm so sorry you are hurting, You know it's ok to be selfish and just want kids and your kids to be healthy, I love you....
Man has God blessed us!!
So onto Isaiah's case.....His next court date is April 18th. At that hearing they will either terminate the parental rights or set a new court date to terminate rights. They can't find either of his parents, so they won't be contesting it. The rest of the biological family is also not in the picture. It's a very sad situation, but that means that things look favorable for us to adopt him. After they do terminate rights there is a 90 day waiting period for family to appeal if they want, but then after that 90 days we can file for adoption!!! We are hoping to be finalized by the fall!!! I cannot wait for him to have our last name!!!!
Well, my little man is waking up now so I need to go.....
Love you all!!!!
I logged on here to write an update about how we are doing without Shaye, and how Isaiah is doing and I found my self reading my last blog about foster care and the need for new homes. A little humbling and a great reminder that although we are longing for children and wanting to adopt, foster care is not about us....dang, did I really write that?
So anyway, around Christmas-time we found out that Shaye would be leaving in a few months to be placed with her grandparents and that she would start having visits soon. In January they started with visits....They are nice, normal people who love her very much. She will be safe and loved. My heart still aches with missing her silly antics and her big hugs, but we are doing well. Truth be told, it was much harder for us during the two months that she was still here, but we knew that she was leaving. You really can't move on with your life while she's still in it. The past three weeks have gone fast, but it still seems like a lifetime ago. She didn't cry when she left, and just waved and said bye-bye....love that silly girl! (for those of you wondering if I'm super-woman, yes I'm crying right now)
I was really worried how Isaiah would handle her being gone. He was so obessed with her! He was always looking for her, laughing at her, and would cry when she would walk away. He's been in heaven!! Apparently being an only child suits him just fine!
He's really becoming interactive and such a happy baby! He developmentally right on target for his premie age. He's finally figured out how to eat off of spoon (I have to put in here that he eats much better for momma). He is really becoming such a momma's boy, and I'm completely ok with that! He's also my only kid who has been a snuggler :) How much more can I say about him? He's just wonderful!!
Health-wise he's doing great as well! He still breathes a little fast and occasionally has a "noisy" airway, but all of that is really improving. His lung doctor has realeased him from her care so that's a great improvement. He now only has 4 doctors to follow up with :) Hey that's down from 7!!
One huge answer to prayer that we hadn't shared with many people was his genetic testing. Back in October we received information that supposedly at least 4 of his 6 siblings had muscular dystrophy, and a 5th one was being tested. My heart hit the floor. All that I could think of was all of the kids that I had seen in the PICU who were dying from Muscular Dystrophy and I was terrified! CPS couldn't/wouldn't give us specific information regarding the type of MD the siblings had and they wouldn't put us in touch with the families that have custody of them. It was a very frustrating situation. There are many types of MD and none of the docs wanted to just send out random testing until they knew what type the siblings have. Especially since Isaiah wasn't having sypmtoms (symptoms typically don't appear until age 3-5 years) It took us several months to get an appointment with a genetics doctor to see him. God worked for us that we were able to be seen in the same hospital system that his siblings are seen in and we at least were able to obtain the sibs names from CPS so that the docs could access their records. Because of privacy laws the docs couldn't tell us much, but at least we found out that only 2 of the siblings have MD and what type they have. We were able to test Isaiah for that type and 3 weeks later (just this past week) found out that HE DOESN'T HAVE MUSCULAR DYSTROPHY!!!
The word relief doesn't even begin to describe what I was feeling. I was really struggling with the possible diagnosis. Isaiah had already dealt with so much being born 11 weeks early that I felt that it just wasn't fair for him to have somethings else to deal with. God showed me alot about trusting thru this and I still haven't really completely processed this yet.
So for those of you who have been thinking that I have been acting like a hot mess, nutcase for the past few months, please see the above paragraphs and please forgive me :) Irritable and emotional doesn't begin to describe it. But hopefully I haven't been too bad :) I've had such great friends supporting us during this time and I thank you so much!! You all have been awesome thru everything and I appreciate you more than you can imagine. You know that I try to put on a good face. Some of the greatest things that I hear from them have been: I'm so sorry you are hurting, You know it's ok to be selfish and just want kids and your kids to be healthy, I love you....
Man has God blessed us!!
So onto Isaiah's case.....His next court date is April 18th. At that hearing they will either terminate the parental rights or set a new court date to terminate rights. They can't find either of his parents, so they won't be contesting it. The rest of the biological family is also not in the picture. It's a very sad situation, but that means that things look favorable for us to adopt him. After they do terminate rights there is a 90 day waiting period for family to appeal if they want, but then after that 90 days we can file for adoption!!! We are hoping to be finalized by the fall!!! I cannot wait for him to have our last name!!!!
Well, my little man is waking up now so I need to go.....
Love you all!!!!
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